Her Majesty's Customs and Excise just phoned me to advise that I will receive a summons for tax fraud unless I press the 1 key immediately to be connected to my case officer to negotiate a settlement.
It added that failure to contact them will lead to my arrest and probable imprisonment - or word to that effect. I was frightened by the threat and hit by a panic attack causing my memory to fail me - such that I couldn't remember how to open my smartphone keyboard to hit the 1 key.
Hence I will probably end up in prison.
I will forward my Bumper Fun Book to Lester who can deputise in my absence. He seems to have run a bit dry lately.
Libby reckons it is a scam - the bloke who called was trying to take advantage of my legendary gullibility - however I'm not that daft - she is probably doing the same.
