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THE AUSSIE VERSION OF CREATION (hope no one is offended)

Dazzler · 10 · 2091

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Offline Dazzler

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    THE AUSSIE VERSION OF CREATION (very tongue in cheek) :wink:

    In the beginning God created day and night. He created day for footy matches, going to the beach.....

    And BBQ's......


    He created night for going prawning,
    sleeping and BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.


    On the Second Day, God created water....for surfing, swimming, and BBQ's on the beach,
    and God saw that it was good.


    On the Third Day God created the Earth to bring forth plants to provide malt and yeast for beer
    and wood for BBQs, and God saw that it was good..


    On the Fourth Day God created animals
    and crustaceans,chops, sausages,
    steak and prawns for BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.

    On the Fifth day God created a Bloke to go to the footy, enjoy the beach, drink the beer and eat the meat and prawns at BBQ's, and God saw that it was good.


    On the Sixth Day God saw that the Bloke was lonely and needed someone to go to the footy, surf, drink beer, eat and stand around the barbie with.


    So God created Mates, and God saw that they were good Blokes, and God saw that it was good.

    On the Seventh Day God looked around at the twinkling barbie fires, heard the hiss of opening beer cans and the raucous laughter of all the Blokes. He smelled the aroma of grilled chops and sizzling prawns and God Saw that it was good .. ...

    Well.... Almost good.....

    He saw that the Blokes were too tired to clean up and needed a rest.
    So God created Sheilas to clean the house, to bear children, to wash, to cook and to clean the Barbie, and then God saw that it was not just good.....

    It was better than that, it was Bloody Awesome!

    IT WAS AUSTRALIA!!!!!

 
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Offline Shambles

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He just wanted to make the place more attractive to our convicts :rolleyes: :lol:
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Offline bumpkin

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 :lol: :lol: :lol:

So why did he not notice that he had given them a moan gland when doing the cleaning??  And that is bad??

 :twisted: :twisted:
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Offline Mike SX

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Yeah,

something wrong with the women up here, they just won't put up with it, maybe we're all too tame.

Met an old Aussie friend in London for a drink, he asked my Wife "would you like a drink?" She said "a gin & tonic, please", he replied "I said a bloody drink - not two!"

RIP


Offline 2i30s

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Yeah,

something wrong with the women up here, they just won't put up with it, maybe we're all too tame.

Met an old Aussie friend in London for a drink, he asked my Wife "would you like a drink?" She said "a gin & tonic, please", he replied "I said a bloody drink - not two!"

RIP
:lol:
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Offline 2i30s

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and Steve thought it was bloody good. [but i wont show this to the wife]   :lol: :lol: :eek:
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Offline Shamsis

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Nah, it was pretty funny.





I love the sound of life in Australia apart from the spiders and the heat.
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Offline Dazzler

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I love the sound of life in Australia apart from the spiders and the heat.
 

Tasmania climate would (for the most part) be pleasant for someone from the UK and we don't see too many spiders down here (touch wood)
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Offline eye30

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 :lol: :lol:

But can someone enlighten me as to why female in Oz are called Shelia and not by their own name.

It must cause a problem in company - Hey Shelia, No not you, or you or you etc Yes you!  :lol:
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Offline Dazzler

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 :lol: :lol:

But can someone enlighten me as to why female in Oz are called Shelia and not by their own name.

It must cause a problem in company - Hey Shelia, No not you, or you or you etc Yes you!  :lol:
 

It is not a term that is commonly used (in Tassie anyway) mainly just in jokes... although Bloke is used a bit...

We have some female customers where I work that have the first name "Shiela" (why would you  :rolleyes:)
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