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GENERAL STUFF => GENERAL DISCUSSIONS => Random Chit Chat => Topic started by: eye30 on May 24, 2009, 16:50:31

Title: Best Divorce Letter, ever!
Post by: eye30 on May 24, 2009, 16:50:31
It seems familiar so checked if this had been posted before but didn't come up in search.
So here it is;

I like the ps at the end  :lol: :-[

============================================
Dear wife:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been hell.

Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Husband
P.S. don't try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!


Dear Ex-Husband

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.

It's true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn't work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.

After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess.

I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me.

So take care.

Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl.

I hope that's not a problem
Title: Re: Best Divorce Letter, ever!
Post by: Shambles on May 24, 2009, 16:55:58
:lol: that was great :lol:
Title: Re: Best Divorce Letter, ever!
Post by: Dazzler on May 25, 2009, 13:06:16
 :lol: :lol: .........:lol:
Title: Re: Best Divorce Letter, ever!
Post by: accim on May 25, 2009, 13:13:55
OH no  :eek: :eek:
Title: Re: Best Divorce Letter, ever!
Post by: bumpkin on May 25, 2009, 16:05:28
 :lol: :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: Best Divorce Letter, ever!
Post by: bulldog180 on July 05, 2009, 18:40:14
 :lol:
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