So one day Johnny is up in the loft at his grandparents house having a rummage and comes across a box containing a full Highland outfit.
He gets all dressed up and goes downstairs where his mum is in the kitchen.
"Look mum, I'm a Scotsman" exclaims Johnny.
His mother takes one look and slaps him round the head.
"How dare you say that" she exclaims, "get through to your granny and tell her what you told me!"
Johnny goes through to the front room and sees granny.
"Look granny, I'm a Scotsman"
Granny takes a look, eases out of her chair, picks up her stick and wallops him across the rear.
"Don't you ever say that" says granny "Go and tell your father what you told me!"
Johnny heads out to the garage where dad is fixing granny's car.
"Look dad, I'm a Scotsman"
Dad repeatedly smacks Johnny's bottom.
"I don't ever want to hear you say that again, now go to your room" shouts his father.
Johnny goes to his room and sits thinking about what happened and after ten minutes in comes mum, granny and dad.
"Well have you thought about things Johnny? What have you got to say for yourself?"
"Welll................I've only been Scottish for 20 minutes and I hate you English b******s already!"
