[eye30]

SYMPTOM                                                      FAULT                                                                             ACTION
 
Feet cold and wet.                                          Glass being held at incorrect angle.                                     Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.
 
Feet warm and wet.                                        Improper bladder control.                                                  Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training.
 
Drink unusually pale and tasteless.                    Glass empty.                                                                    Get someone to buy you another drink.
 
Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights.    You have fallen over backward.                                           Have yourself lashed to bar.
 
Mouth contains cigarette butts.                         You have fallen forward.                                                    See above.
 
Alcohol tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.        Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face.        Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.
 
Floor blurred.                                                  You are looking through bottom of empty glass.                   Get someone to buy you another drink.
 
Floor moving.                                                  You are being carried out.

[Dazzler]

 

[Shambles]

likey likey

[bumpkin]

Seen it before but it is a cracker

[2i30s]

ive been there,i think.i cant remember

[SRT Metro]

 

[Hemmi]